Drop the Pressure—and Get the Results
A two-day experiential workshop for women who work with men, play with men, lead men, live with men, and love men—and want to stop forcing the outcome, exhausting themselves, and giving away their power.
In person · Location to be announced · Tuition: $555 for the two-day workshop
New participants must be accepted before registration is confirmed. Returning Karen Baker participants do not need additional acceptance. Your credit card will not be charged unless you are accepted into or personally invited to join the workshop.
Men Are Not Like You
If you're losing the sale, alienating the audience, feeling overly serious, unsupported, or attacked, your approach may be creating unwanted responses, adversarial dynamics, or simply proving ineffective in some situations.
How to Talk to Men Live is a place to learn through observation, practice, and experience. It's a laboratory for what women do best: notice nuances about people. When you notice and recognize unworkable patterns, you can choose to replace them with enlivening alternatives.
These are not personal flaws or failures. They are communication habits that can be noticed, examined, and changed.
You Know How to Communicate. So Why Does This Feel So Hard?
You're capable, competent, and seasoned. So why can a conversation with a man still leave you feeling unheard, dismissed, confused, or frustrated?
- —You explain more, but the conversation becomes more muddled.
- —You keep the peace, but forget what you wanted to begin with.
- —You speak firmly, but wonder whether you were too harsh—and feel guilty about it.
- —You take responsibility to make the relationship work, while the man you're talking to becomes distant, defensive, or disengaged.
- —You second-guess and do the emotional labor, while he moves on with zero self-examination.
- —Your brain is tired from analyzing and super-tired at day's end from one more run-in.
Sometimes the Habit Is So Familiar That You Do Not Notice It
- —You expect push-back from the get-go.
- —You assume rather than ask.
- —You offer a long explanation when what's potent is a clear observation, request, or desired result.
- —You ask for his opinion and immediately explain why it is wrong.
- —You make a request while secretly believing you will have to handle everything yourself anyway.
More Than Finding the Right Words
When you can see what is happening beneath the words, you can change the entire intention of the communication. It's a rare woman that knows this—but the ones who do can take charge with ease. Talking to men is about more than what you say.
It is about what you bring to the interaction: your expectations, assumptions, clarity, and desires. It is about what you face and avoid, what you notice and what you pretend you don't—and what happens inside you facing disagreement or a less-than-desirable response.
Listen to the Music Underneath Your Spoken Words
- —Your intention
- —Your feelings: uncertainty, overlooked, or challenged
- —Your opinions: he's arrogant, argumentative, a flirt
- —Explaining does not create understanding
- —Men hear and respond differently than you expect
- —Remove the personal and increase your ability to observe for increased effectiveness
- —Remain open and curious without surrendering your authority
- —How clarity, respect, and self-possession create stronger partnerships
- —Your ingrained communication patterns and their natural consequences
- —Why men and women communicate differently
Noticing Changes More Than Changing
Share and solicit information instead of taking the interaction personally. When you separate what you notice from the meaning you assign to it, you create room for information, curiosity, and choice. You are not changing yourself to manage another person—you are noticing what is happening and choosing how you want to engage.
The focus shifts to proving who is right, defending intentions, or assigning blame.
You describe what you observe, share what you intend, and ask what the other person sees.
You Cannot Change What You Cannot See
Your communication patterns were formed in your past, your family, and by the people who raised you. Many patterns are automatic—practiced to perfection through years of repetition.
Whether they are making life difficult or not, you cannot change them until you stop reacting and observe what is happening. Once you can see them, you can choose more effective patterns that foster respect, partnership, and clarity.
Patterns That Dilute Your Power
Overexplaining
You fear you will not be understood, believed, or taken seriously, so you talk the point past his listening tolerance.
Indirect
Hinting, suggesting, or hoping he understands what you want instead of making a clear request.
Ask, Then Attack
Requesting input but treating the answer as criticism, opposition, or complaining.
Assuming
Reacting rather than asking or engaging with what he is communicating or thinking.
Taking It Personally
Hearing a question, pause, disagreement, or differing opinion as rejection of you rather than information.
Lone Ranger
Taking over because it feels faster or safer, while resenting that you are not receiving enough help.
Competition
Proving the point instead of identifying the decision, agreement, or result that could serve everyone.
Withholding Appreciation
Failing to acknowledge contribution because you do not receive enough recognition yourself, which diminishes team spirit.
Choice, Not Blame
The purpose is not to make women responsible for every difficult or awkward interaction. We help you recognize where you have choices and what you can change without expecting someone else to change first. Responsibility is power.
Clarity Is the Most Vital Leadership Tool
Get Clear About What You Want
Explore the difference between wanting to be right, understood, or supported and wanting to create a specific result.
Say What You See
Communicate observations, perspective, and intelligence without burying the point beneath unnecessary explanation.
Ask Without Apologizing
Express what you want directly while remaining open to conversation, response, and collaboration.
Listen for Perspective
Ask what a man sees, thinks, or recommends without assuming that listening requires agreement.
Stay Grounded
Learn the language of observation that gets everyone on the same page. Avoid stories and interpretations that divide you from others.
Make Room for Differences
Use curiosity, questions, and clear language to honor his perspective while offering your own—without turning the conversation into a battle.
Create Partnership
Invite men into meaningful participation, responsibility, and support instead of doing everything alone.
Communicate a Desired Outcome
Move beyond frustration toward a clearer decision, commitment, agreement, or next step.
Recognize and Appreciate Actions
Acknowledge contribution, progress, and partnership without minimizing your own role or power. Receiving another perspective gives you more information. You retain authority to choose what you do with it.
You Will Rehearse—Practice Makes Perfect
You will practice alternatives and notice what changes in the moment. These role plays are enlightening, earthshaking, and vulnerable.
We use teaching, role play, observation, feedback, distinctions, reflection, demonstration, conversation, collaboration, and practice. The workshop is active and interactive, supporting you as you experiment with new skills while staying connected to yourself. Deep trust grows between the women in the room as they unlearn, relearn, and rehearse communication skills.
Bring your own real-life situations, identify the patterns at play, and understand why the outcomes unfolded as they did.
Scenarios We May Practice
- —Asking for help without apologizing
- —Discussing money or compensation
- —Expressing a differing opinion to a male leader or colleague
- —Setting a boundary without creating an adversarial dynamic
- —Asking a partner, family member, or colleague for greater participation
- —Responding when you receive a no or get an unexpected answer
- —Receiving advice without resisting, reacting, or giving up
- —Communicating what happened and what result you want next
- —Recognizing controlling behavior while asking for partnership
There Is No Perfect Communication
Observation reveals what is happening. Intention creates leadership. Our tools offer you different choices—choices that affect your outcome and align with reality. That's workable! You are not expected to perform, only to play, and to learn from your and others' interactions. The goal is greater awareness and choice, ease, playfulness, and the ability to create a different dynamic when the old one no longer works.
These Dynamics Show Up
This work is not only about dating or romantic relationships.
Business & Leadership
Voice concern or a differing view without caving, compromising, or confronting.
Money & Sales
When you know what to expect, you can engage powerfully. Name your price, entertain objections, be honest, and stay in the game.
Work & Collaboration
Excite your team to participate while making room for others to contribute.
Family
Navigate disagreements and family dynamics through observation, free from family history or unspoken expectations.
Express the Desires More Clearly Than the Disappointments
You may want more help, connection, partnership, and intimacy, but unconsciously be communicating disappointment more loudly than your actual desire.
This Experience Is for You If…
- —You're capable and successful, but conversations with men often leave you frustrated or misunderstood.
- —You overexplain because you want to make sure your point is understood.
- —You agree to take on too much rather than risk disappointing others.
- —You are not great at saying no and protecting your energy.
- —You want support but are not sure how to get it—and can come across as demanding or as a doormat.
- —You shrink around power or armor up when you feel unheard.
- —You ask for a man's opinion but struggle to hear an authentic answer.
- —You want to disagree without fear of abandonment or damaging the relationship.
- —You struggle to separate a man's response from what you believe it says about you.
- —You are ready to examine your own patterns without blaming yourself or men.
- —You want more partnership in business, family, leadership, money, or love.
- —You're tired of your own disappointment and discontent but don't know how to change it.
- —You experience anger, resentment, or controlling feelings at work, at home, or in relationships.
You only need to be willing to look honestly at what is happening and practice something new.
In Their Own Words
Approved story pending — what conversations felt like before, what she recognized, what she changed, and how the response changed.
Approved story pending — connecting the workshop to a specific professional conversation, decision, negotiation, or result.
Approved story pending — becoming grounded, asking clearly, receiving support, or no longer overexplaining.
Two Days to Notice the Way You Engage
Space is intentionally limited to preserve intimacy, connection, practice, and personal support.
Saturday + Sunday · In person · Location to be announced · Tuition: $555
New applicants must be accepted before registration is confirmed. Returning participants do not need additional acceptance. A credit card is required with the application, but it will not be charged unless the applicant is accepted or personally invited.
This Is Not About Shrinking for Men—or Cutting Them Down to Size
- —Manipulating or pleasing men
- —Pretending not to have feelings
- —Making men responsible for your happiness
- —Staying silent to avoid conflict
- —Acting less intelligent or capable
- —Following rules to become more desirable
- —Giving away your power at your expense
- —Automatically agreeing with a man's perspective
- —Blaming them for every communication snag
- —Criticizing or complaining to get your way
Clarity, curiosity, self-esteem, and respect.
Listening does not require giving up. Curiosity does not make you stupid. Appreciating another's contribution does not diminish your own.
Asking for support does not make you dependent or weak. Giving in does not mean you lost.
You do not have to surrender your authority to create connection. You do not have to get tough to hold your ground.
What You Take Away From the Experience
The workshop is not about having one perfect conversation.
- —Recognize when an old pattern is taking over
- —Feel the tone change and get it back on track
- —Identify what you actually want and set an intention before beginning
- —Separate your observation from the story you created
- —Ask clearly and directly
- —Share your perspective without overexplaining
- —Ask for another perspective and genuinely listen
- —Stay present when someone disagrees
- —Become curious rather than defensive
- —Receive help, contribution, and support—and feel well cared for
- —Create clear agreements and next steps
- —Hold your authority without becoming rigid
- —Approach men as possible partners rather than problems
- —Experience equality, give and take, banter, humor, and partnership
Nearly Three Decades Working With Women, Men, and Power
For nearly three decades, Karen Baker has helped women change how they communicate, ask for and get what they want, work with men, receive support, and claim their power to create success that feels good to them.
Her approach draws on ancient teachings brought into modern application, authentic conversation, emotional intimacy and transparency, observation, feedback, personal reflection, and hands-on practice. Expect to leave the theoretical space of how things should be and enter the real world of men, women, authority, power, money, sex, ways people sabotage, and what you can do to create a healthier, more harmonious environment.
How to Talk to Men Live is Karen's signature communication experience and a clear portal into her larger offerings at Business As Pleasure.
What You Might Be Wondering
Workshop Purpose & Format
Is this only about romantic relationships?
No. The principles apply to business, leadership, sales, money, family, friendship, and intimate relationships.
Is this about pleasing men?
No. It is about staying in your pleasure and sovereignty while fostering clarity and remaining connected to your intelligence, authority, desires, and self-respect.
Do I need to be in a relationship?
No. The workshop is relevant to women who interact with men in any part of their lives, including work, play, sales, supervision, parenting, marriage, partnership, and father-daughter relationships.
Is it online? Where is it held?
The scheduled workshops take place in person in settings chosen to support the experience. The exact location will be announced before the event.
Tuition, Acceptance & Payment
What is the tuition?
$555 for the complete two-day workshop. A VIP evening may be offered at select events at an additional investment.
Do I need to be accepted?
New applicants complete a short questionnaire so Karen's team can get to know them and support an elevated workshop experience. Previous Business As Pleasure participants do not need to apply again.
When is my card charged?
A card is required with the application but is charged only after acceptance or personal invitation.
Does applying guarantee a place?
No. Your seat is confirmed after acceptance—or returning-participant status—and successful payment.
Capacity, Preparation & What Comes Next
What if my requested date is full?
Choose another available workshop or join the waitlist.
What should I bring?
Preparation details and anything needed will be provided after registration is confirmed.
What comes next?
Power, Pleasure & Paydays (with Men), the 90-day group experience focused on prosperous partnerships, money, asking, desires, receiving, influence, status, and results.
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